The Princess and the Frog Remix
by Luvylinds
Summary: This is my own little modern remake of the Princess and the Frog. Please read and review.


Lindsay Baughman

Mrs. Lord

English 3/ per 6

March 14, 2011

The first thing you should know before I start my story is that I am not a princess. If there was ever anything that the Grimm Brothers got wrong, it was that. There was a frog. There was a witch. And there was a curse. But really, that's it.

I was raised in an insignificant town in Northern California called Cottonwood. Trees sprang out of the ground in any patch of light they could find. Vegetation prospered in the valley, enough to care for the rest of the growing nation of people. Despite their beautiful surroundings, the people in Cottonwood were a very unscrupulous and treacherous bunch. Cottonwood was a sleeping bear; nothing could wake its cankerous people from the curse that gripped them by the throat.

Several years ago a beautiful young man, who I guess could have qualified for the title of prince, pissed off the wrong woman. Apparently you shouldn't call a witch a fat heifer. Who would of thought? And I say this with as much sarcasm as I can muster. Who could really blame her when she said, in what I have heard was a horrendously screechy voice, "Until you can find someone who can see the beauty through the hideous exterior, you will remain eternal as a frog. The corruption in the hearts in this town will rot them from the inside out until the kiss of a fair maiden sets you all free." I kid you not, she actually said 'fair maiden'.

Now we come to the part of our riveting tale where I make my debut. Now contrary to most fairytales, nobody would consider me a 'fair maiden'. Even my parents could only grace me with the title of homely. My hair fell dull and brown in a style that even the ocean couldn't put a wave in. I was stout, barely reaching five foot. And my middle had once been described as an overfilled muffin cup. People would always say to me "Thank the Lord that you have brains Mackenzie, because it isn't your looks that are going to get you anywhere in life." I did mention the cankerous part of the spell right? Shame in my looks had caused a deep-set shyness in me and I rarely found myself in the company of my peers. It was my solitary life style that eventually led me to meet my frog prince.

On the property behind the house where I lived with my parents, was a pond guarded by lazy weeping willow trees. Their leafy hair swept the green grassy ground, creating an impenetrable cloak around the pool. Inside of the oasis were fields of bright yellow, purple, pink, white, and orange wild flowers. Their fragrant aroma blanketed me and lay on my tongue till I could taste their scent. The pond was a place of solace for me in my troubling teenage years. I would sit on the sandy shore of the pool and ponder the cruelty of all of the people around me. At this time I was unaware of the witch's curse or of its effects on the people around me.

On the particular day when our story was set in motion, I was at my pond crying over the hurtful words I had been taunted with that day at school. While this was nothing new to me, today had been the proverbial straw on the camel's back. I was letting all of my pain and frustration wash over my face when I heard a croaking voice tell me, "Please don't cry."

I gasped in shock and the tears froze on their trail down my face. "W-who's there?" I called out. My eyes scanned the clearing but could find no one hiding in its depths. "Nobody important." The voice cried. Seriously this guy must have had a frog in his throat. It croaked out loudly across the pond's alcove.

"Where are you?" I asked. I was starting to get very angry at this unknown intruder. How dare he spy on me! "It would be better if you didn't have to see me." He whispered, "Everyone screams when they see me."

"I won't scream. But you hiding is really starting to freak me out."

"Promise you won't scream?"

"I promise."

I'm proud to say that I didn't scream. But man was it a close call. Remember how I said that his voice had sounded like there was a frog in his throat? Well there wasn't. Instead, an actual frog hopped out of the pond to plop down at my feet. A big, green, warty frog. There was a talking frog sitting at my feet. Okay I had obviously gone crazy.

"At least you didn't scream." He commented, "I hate it when they scream."

"I hate to be the one to point out the obvious," I said." But you're a talking frog." My views on the world were drastically changing in that moment, so I felt that I deserved the right to establish the basic facts.

"Wait I am?" He exclaimed sarcastically.

"Hey! Don't be sarcastic with me Mr. Frog. It's not every day that I meet an amphibian that can talk." I didn't know that frogs could look contrite, but somehow he managed it.

"Look I'm sorry. My people skills are a little rusty. You're the first person I have talked to in many years. The other frogs aren't as chatty as I am." Though the frog had been rude first, I felt guilt pour into my heart. What can I say; I was a sucker for outcasts.

"This may seem like an obvious question, but how can you talk?" I asked.

"I wasn't always a frog. Once I was a human man, and quite a gorgeous one too if I may say so. My golden hair would tangle with the sun beams until you couldn't tell one from the other. My eyes were as blue as an azure sky in summer. My jaw had the edge of a heroic-"

I cut him off and sarcastically said "Let me guess, you were cursed to look like this to learn humility?" This frog's ego seemed to know no bounds. 'How did you know?" He asked looking at me imploringly. "Just a lucky guess." I murmured, "So how did you get cursed?"

"It's kind of a long story." He said gazing down at his little webbed feet. I sank down to sit in front of him. I settled back against the scratchy bark of the nearest Willow and allowed him to hop up on my knee. My attention became riveted on the little green wonder on my knee. "Well I'm comfortable now so go ahead and start your story Mr. Frog."

"Well first off my name isn't 'Mr. Frog', its Kyle."

"Hello Kyle, my name is Mackenzie. But you may call me Mac. It is a pleasure to meet you." Kyle bowed his little green head to me and said, "Trust me Mac the pleasure is mine. You are the first person I have talked to since the witch cursed me. Usually when people see me they run away screaming."

"How long ago was that?" I asked.

'I honestly don't know. I don't think that I am aging though. A lot of seasons have come since I have been here."

"Wait. You have been _here_, as in here at this pond?" I questioned with growing alarm. "Yes I have." He questioned.

"Does that mean you have seen me here before?"

"Yes."

"And you're just now saying something to me! Have you been spying on me? That is so creepy!" I shouted at him. I jumped up; he went tumbling to the ground and landed with a thud at my feet.

"What did you expect me to do?" Kyle shouted back at me, "Most people don't react very kindly to talking frogs."

"Then what caused you to talk to me now?" I asked befuddled.

"You seemed so sad. I just wanted to see if you were alright." He said sadly.

"Oh." I whispered, sitting back down. Now I felt guilty again. "Sorry I yelled at you." I mumbled.

"It's okay." Kyle said as he jumped back up onto my knee.

"You were telling me about how you were turned into a frog." I reminded him.

"Oh yeah. Let's see… I was outside of the school one morning, like usual. Most of my friends were surrounding me at one of the tables on the school's grassy lawns. I had been recounting my winning basket at the previous night's basketball game. My adoring audience had been hanging on my every word, when I saw this hideous freak walk by. This gargantuan mountain just walked in front of me. Not only was she obese but she also had the ugliest face I had ever seen. Her eyes were small and beady in her swollen face. She had this obviously dyed red hair that clung to her sweaty face. Her clothes were like cheap, thrift-store Goth. She was atrocious to look at."

I could not believe this guy. How could he be this rude to anyone? "I can't believe you would say something like that about another human being!"I exclaimed at him. His face turned this odd shade of muddy brown when his red blush mixed with his green skin.

"I realize now that it was wrong. At the time I felt that I had every right to state the obvious. It never occurred to me that it would hurt the feelings of the people I taunted. I was one of the beautiful people and if you weren't one of us then you weren't worth our attention." He said sadly. "That's pathetic." I said hotly. "Yeah it is." "Continue please." I said.

Kyle thought for a minute then went on, "Due to previously stated reasons, I felt justified when I shouted at her, 'Hey fat ass waddle around elsewhere! We don't need any earthquakes toppling the school.'" I gasped at the harsh words, but he continued on as if he hadn't heard d me. "She stopped walking and turned to look at me and my taunting friends. 'I don't believe that you deserve a point of view when all you see is yourself. You are the ugly one Kyle and someday the world is going to see you as you truly are.' Her words sent fear running down my spine but I continued on, 'I'm a cover model worthy, rich man. You are a fat heifer. Who is the truly ugly one here?' 'You are.' She whispered at me. I opened my mouth to respond but she just looked me in the eyes and smirked before continuing on her way. It wasn't until later that day that I realized what she really was. At midnight that same night, I woke up to a strange tingling sensation working up my body. My skin started to pull taut over my bones. Pain marched like ants up and down my nerves. I screamed and yet no sound came out of my mouth. Green spilled over my skin until I was covered in it. I don't know how long it was before I passed out from the pain. The next morning I awoke to the sound of our maid shrieking. It turns out that she was terrified to find a frog in bed rather than her employer's son."

Kyle looked so sad at this point that I felt compelled to say, "I'm so sorry Kyle. That must have been a very scary thing to wake up to."

"It was." He whispered, "I tried to tell my parents what had happened. When I went into their room, my mom just screamed and threw her shoe at me. I was terrified. I hopped into the garden out her open window. I just kept hopping and hopping until I came to this pond. The water was soothing to me so I just stayed. Sometimes people would come to the pond. I would try talking to them, but it always ended in disaster. I finally just quit."

I stroked a finger down the rough skin of his back to comfort him. Kyle's tale was tragic. Nobody, not even an egotistical jerk, deserved the pain he had gone through.

"After a while, a girl started to some to my pond. She interested me. She would stare at the water for hours, or mutter to herself about things that I couldn't even begin to understand. I contemplated talking to her. I always found myself to be too cowardly. Then one day, the girl came to our pond sobbing in pain. The sound of her tears ripped apart my heart; her pain became my own. I had to do anything possible to soothe her." Kyle looked up at me expectantly.

Tears pooled in my eyes as Kyle concluded his touching tale. My poor little frog prince had endured so much. He had learned his lesson in humility the hard way. "Oh Kyle, that's so sad. I'm sorry about everything that had happened to you. I wish there was something I could do to make everything better."

"But there is!" He exclaimed, leaning closer to me. "Just kiss me."

"What?" I gasped.

"The witch said that the curse could be broken by the kiss of a fair maiden." He was getting excited now.

"But I'm not beautiful.' I said sadly. I didn't want to be the one to burst his bubble, but I felt that I had to.

'Mac, you are beautiful on the inside. I have watched you agonize over the torment that you see in other people. It hurts you even as it hurts them. It takes someone who has a beautiful soul to feel that much." Kyle's kind words touched m. It was hard to doubt what he said when he said them with such conviction.

"I just need to kiss you?" I asked shyly.

"Please." He implored.

I took a deep breath, puckered up, and kissed his slimy head. There was no way I was going to kiss a frog on the mouth. That was simply disgusting.

I guess kissing his head was enough, because a bright light emanated from his body. He was the sun personified. A frog body morphed and stretched into a solid human mans. A green torso twisted into broad shoulders. His arms and webbed fingers returned to their original human form. His face once again became that of a human's. I was going to hate to admit this, but he hadn't lied when describing himself.

When his body had finally stopped changing and he had gotten his bearings, Kyle looked down at me and smiled. "I never realized you were so short Mac." He chuckled.

"Hey don't tease me! If it wasn't for me, you would still be a frog.' I said, pushing playfully at his chest.

"I am very grateful to you. You gave me my life back Mackenzie.' He guided my hand up to his mouth and kissed my knuckles. "You truly are a beautiful person Mac.'


End file.
